This is a weird topic and not for the squeamish. I'm serious. If you're easily grossed out, stop reading.
That being said...those of you in a relationship: what are your bathroom boundaries?
Mine used to be very cut and dry. When I'm in the bathroom, he's not. Period. I didn't mind if he wanted to brush his teeth while I was in the shower, but anything involving the toilet was off limits until I was done.
As our relationship progressed, the boundaries changed. It started with peeing while the other one was in the shower. Then it was peeing while the other one was brushing their teeth.
The boundaries had been reset. I was OK with them.
And then they changed.
Michael got sick. The kind of sick that makes you go to the bathroom. A lot. Our house is small and there's only one bathroom. So when someone's really sick, you know it. Now I worked in a daycare for a year after college. I've changed more than my fair share of dirty diapers and went through countless accidents that occur during potty training. Obviously I don't enjoy other people's bowel movements, but I can handle them.
Since he would be in there so long, we would end up talking through the door. I'd be playing with the dog, he'd be doing his business. It actually didn't seem that weird, except for when he would talk about it. Is it all guys or just My Guy that likes to discuss the details of his excrements?
Eventually it started cutting into my routine. I needed to do my makeup before work, but he was occupying the room. So I'd dash in, grab my stuff and dash out. Then finally, he had to go when I was in the shower. What can you do, say no?
Now we did not make a habit of this. That was an emergency situation. He does not have the freedom to do as he pleases on the toilet while I'm in there. I don't bring in a chair and discuss current events. This will never be a regular event for two. It's still a private time.
And then this morning, while he was in the shower, it hit me. I had to go. It was my turn to push the boundaries. Was I ready for it? I momentarily panicked. Up until now it had always been him going in my presence. Was I ready to share the most personal of situations, which could potentially included noises or smells?
Turns out I was. Oh he made fun of me, of course. But it wasn't that bad.
I cannot wait until we have two bathrooms.
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4 comments:
Omigod, wow. You two have reached a whole new level of intimacy. My boyfriend and I are definitely still at the "if one of us is in the bathroom, the other one is not" stage. I don't know if we'll ever progress from there. He did get very sick recently, the go to the bathroom all the time kind, and we'd discuss - lightly - what was going on there. But that's about the extent of it!
I was very content with the seperate bathroom time. But I'm ok with where we are now. Like I said, it's not a regular event, but when it happens it happens.
I think this is a good thing...that we're so comfortable. At least, I hope it is!
We no longer have boundaries. And yes (*gasp*) Bub has mentioned the details of his movements at times (gross, I know), but I would be guilty if I did not return the favor and share a detail or two about mine. I have an extremely sensitive stomach and let's just say that he's seen it all.
speaking of bathroom habits, one of the biggest one i've seen is that my girlfriend always runs the water when she's in there. i heard a lot of women have this anxiety. some run the water, play music (if there's a radio in there), or whatever. while searching the web one late night i stumbled across this hilarious yet very perfect product.
check it out:
http://www.thetoilettunesvideo.com
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